Rabbi Daniel: Thoughts on Torah

Dear friends,

In 5786 we are reading the first triennial each week, which means starting each parsha at the beginning.  The last verse of the first aliyah (44:20) is: 

וַנֹּ֙אמֶר֙ אֶל־אֲדֹנִ֔י יֶשׁ־לָ֙נוּ֙ אָ֣ב זָקֵ֔ן וְיֶ֥לֶד זְקֻנִ֖ים קָטָ֑ן וְאָחִ֣יו מֵ֔ת וַיִּוָּתֵ֨ר ה֧וּא לְבַדּ֛וֹ לְאִמּ֖וֹ וְאָבִ֥יו אֲהֵבֽוֹ׃
We told my lord, ‘We have an old father, and there is a child of his old age, the youngest; his full brother is dead, so that he alone is left of his mother, and his father dotes on him.’

One wonders whether Judah had any time to craft his plea before Joseph, or if he had to wing it all on the spot. I think Judah had grown up significantly by this time and felt   that honesty would be the best policy.

At the same time, misdeeds tend to trap us, and thus one cannot fully keep to one's commitment even if it is what they want to do.  

According to Rashi's commentary on Judah's speech to Joseph, Judah claims that he had held nothing back from Joseph concerning their father and younger brother. But, in verse four, Judah realizes he can't tell the truth because one of Rachel's sons had not been accounted for.  Rashi continues on by commenting that after telling two truths (about his father and his youngest brother) Judah chose to lie about Joseph because he was afraid that Joseph would require him to bring that older brother down to Egypt.

It seems to me that what is in play here is that old lesson we have learned as children;

 "You tell one lie, it leads to another, then you tell two lies to cover each other." Even though Judah had matured since the time of his and his brother's major transgression (selling Joseph to Egypt and lying to their father about it) he wouldn't be able to truly reinvent himself until there was some recompense (or a least some resolution and forgiveness) for what he and his brothers had done.  

The bottom line is that one can't just become someone new by forgetting about the past.  One has to deal with the past and then one can become the better person one wants to be.

Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Daniel